"wish house arest thow bro ratyssssss"
This was a comment left on a Facebook event page for one of my shows.
I have no clue at what it could mean.
I really would like to hear this kid speak the sentence out loud to see what it is he's trying to communicate with the world.
Wut is teechers be learnin kidsssss toda?
Moving on.
Money.
It's hard to get and very hard to keep.
It's funny how being in the music business costs so much and it's so very hard to make good money doing it.
I've always read articles about touring when I come across them and a majority of them state that the goal of your tour is to break even. Sounds reasonable. Touring is expensive. Gas, food, places to sleep. It gets pretty expensive especially when your high paying days are thursday through Saturday. The rest you kind of hope for the best.
So my goal has been break even. Something I have not been able to do.... until last month!
Yup, I actually made money on a tour. I didn't realize it until the last 3 days. I kept track of money coming in and out and it seems you can make some cash on the road.
It just took almost 3 years.
It's not a lot I could easily make more at my part job. But that's not the point.
It's awesome to realize that I can make a sustainable living playing original music around the country.
Playing shows is one way to make it. I've recently received a cheque from Google for the ads placed on my blog, website (www.eyeswide.ca) and youtube videos. Just from people clicking on the ads.
(Hint if you are on any independent musician or artist's website and they have an ad on it, click it. It helps them out)
Here you can Date Asian girls just from watching my Video for #22!
Sadly I have made more money from Google Ads than I have with my download sales through iTunes, Amazon, and other such sites.
And The mighty SOCAN another source of revenue. From people playing your songs, the shows you play with a cover charge of more than $6 and radio airplay gets transferred into funds for my bank account. I've only received 1 small cheque from them but every little bit helps.
But alas, there seems to be some kind of Music Ying and Yang God keeping track of my funds.
I've been making a little bit more with music, getting paid a little more for gigs, the ads, merch sales. but it all goes back into the music.
I just bought a loop pedal. I haven't had much time to play with it yet but eventually...
It cost $300
I recorded a song "You're a Mean One Mr. Grinch" recording it at a very low cost spent $150 then getting the licence to sell it online $60. Uploading the cost $20-30.
I've gotten a lots of compliments on the song, but only a hand full of downloads and only receiving .60 cent for each. I haven't even paid off the uploading cost yet. maybe next Christmas it will blow up!
My guitar case finally gave in from the wear and tear and a new one will cost $80-90
I'm heading into the studio next week to record a song called Brick. the cost is $50 an hour. I'm guessing I'll be there anywhere from 3-6 hours.
Sometimes you get the tales of woe not getting paid from the venue or just being taken by a scam.
I think I've been lucky and have only had 2 such happenings. One in my own city of Barrie, where the manager would not pay what he said he was going to so after paying the other acts and the sound man. I walked out with nothing. Needless to say I don't frequent the place anymore.
The other one happened 2 years this summer. I signed up to play a festival at Downsview Park outside of Toronto called The Imagine Fest. They didn't have a set line up Chubby Checker and a few others were the only acts locked in and I was told that Sheryl Crow and Tool were being optioned for headliners. They asked the artists to do the near impossible task of selling VIP tickets before the line ups had been made. for $120
I did sell 5.
I gave my money to the promoter Kris Christie. (Yup, dropping his name) and a month later the fest was cancelled.
I had the people who I sold tickets to asking for the money back and I had assurances from Christie that I would get refunded for the tickets sold so I just paid everyone back myself. But I never got reimbursed. emails went back and forth for the better part of a year Christie saying you'll have the money by Tuesday, by next week, the week after. and then he stopped responding. and he wouldn't return my phone calls. a year later I emailed his partner but they had parted ways.
So $600 was gone. I've had other bands message me and ask did you get money back on your ticket sales?
I thought about small claims court but all the time trying to find him, serve papers go to court multiple times is it worth all the time? I figured no. I would just write about him in my blog. So there you go Kris Christie, Toronto music promoter who ripped me off in my first year of being musician.
This appears to be one of those informative blogs lacking in humour.
How about this lets talk about my tour.
While on tour I stayed in a Victorian house in Woodstock, NB
the man who owned it was an 80 year old OCD professor of French literature.
He gave me one of his old man sweaters.
He asked me one evening to watch a nature show with him on PBS. "They have really good nature shows."
Sure why not.
we sit down in the haunted library.
he had books from the 1790's on that shelf. I really wanted to look at them but I was afraid the pages would turn to dust.
Anyway, we sat down and the show was about the history of tupperware. Not a nature show. The only interesting thing I got from it was that the creator of tupperware had lots of ideas that didn't really work out like the knife-comb and the fish powered boat.
I couldn't stand to watch it all so I went off to bed to read. Oddly enough I was reading about the history of the Dinning room. Another thing that one wouldn't find incredibly interesting.
Driving through New Brunswick I passed a city sign that read "Bedford: A traditional Stopping place."
Wow, I thought, that's pretty bland. That slogan would actually fit the city I passed an hour back.
It was called Blandford.
The things I think about while alone in the car with my Merch girl.
She enjoys getting out and seeing the country.
She gets some lovin' from time to time.
I got to work on my gay demographic this tour I stayed in Moncton and crashed with a great guy (Steve!) who tried to get me a gig last minute. It didn't work out but he invited his friends and neighbours over for a house concert. turns out I was the only straight dude in the place. We did a great sing along to Adele's Rolling in the Deep.
Steve took me to the best Breakfast buffet I've ever had. I had 2 Eggs Benedict and multiple piles of bacon.
On the way back in Toronto I played at The Old Nick. When walked in I thought,
"Hey there's a lot of ladies with short hair in here."
About a half an hour later "Oooooh. I'm playing in, what their website termed as, a gay friendly bar"
And the guys who ran last years Toronto's Gay Pride Music Fest didn't think I'd be a good fit to play at the festival.
Edmundston has the worst city sign it's a dude dressed in an outfit that looks like it's from the early 1900's and he's holding the least impressive bouquet of flowers I've ever seen. great job Edmundston. I sadly did not get a picture. so this section is pretty usuless. I apologize for wasting your seconds.
And here's another one I wrote "ride the wave" in my notes. I have no idea what it means. But at the time I thought it was all I needed to remind myself of the awesome tale that it was to represent. Make up your own story for that.
(feel free to let me know what you come up with)
This house was not built for Neil Crowes. Edmundston, NB
I bought these at a gas station in Quebec. stopped at another gas station 10 minutes down the road bought a second bag.
And this man slept in a McDonald's while his wife did the crossword.
Coming back from the tour I jumped right back into substitute teaching and I ended up teaching the 12 year old version of Napoleon Dynamite.
Curly fro and all even that long breathy sigh.
I tell the class to take out the text books.
Napoleon doesn't.
"Napolean (obviously his name is not Napoleon but I chose not to use his real name) take out your math text."
"I don't have one."
The kid who sits next to him says "Ya he does it's in his desk"
"Is it in your desk?" I ask.
"No."
The girl behind him says "yes it is I can see it."
"Is there a math text in your desk?" I ask again.
"No."
I grabb the desk lift it on an angle and look inside. "what's that then?" pointing at his math text.
"Hhhhhhhhhhhh (long breathy Napoleon sigh) I just really don't want to do this right now."
I almost laughed in his face.
Later on we went to go read with the kindergaten class. He left his 5 year old partner to go play with a Mr. Potato Head.
I can't say it was a constructive use of class time but a student did draw me this week.
I've got some more teacher stuff but I think I'll save them for an all teacher tale blog.
What's coming up now is that I've got a tour in New York from the 12-17 I'll be in Rochester, Brooklyn, New Jersey and Manhattan with Brittney Fulton check her out here and Kelsey Warren who I've toured with will join us for a show in Jersey City at The Lucky 7 Tavern.
And next month I fly to Las Vegas for the first time ever and play a show at The Freakin' Frog! I'm also there for a wedding that might be fun too.
I'm booking a long tour starting from June through September. It's a slow process. but I'll be in Europe in June so far in Italy and Austria. If there are any Europeans reading this feel free to suggest or help out with venues.
then July and August I'll be in the Western half of Canada and finally August and September back in the Eastern half.
Mar 03, 2012 The Stinking Rose Campbellford, ON
Mar 12, 2012 Boulder Coffe Co. Rochester, NY
Mar 13, 2012 Lucky 7 Jersey City, NJ
Mar 14, 2012 Delancey New York, NY
Mar 16, 2012 Hank's Saloon Brooklyn, NY
Mar 17, 2012 Bait & Tackle Brooklyn, NY
Mar 23, 2012 Groovy Tuesday's Barrie, ON
Mar 24, 2012 Griffon Gastropub Bracebridge, ON
Apr 26, 2012 Freakin' Frog Las Vegas, NV
May 11, 2012 Michael & Marion's Barrie, ON
May 12, 2012 Michael & Marion's Barrie, ON
May 25, 2012 The Local Barrie, ON
Also I've got to record a new album by the end of May.
I should get on that.
Alright I've got to leave the bed and do something that allows my body to move.
until next time...
-Neil
www.eyeswide.ca
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